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Believe Energy Guest Blogger Healing

Fairy Tales

Three Things Jen Weir and I have in common:

  1. We share a coach.
  2. We live on the east coast.
  3. We are committed to helping you find your passion and live the life of your dreams.

I am honored to welcome Jen to our Believe in Bunnies community today. Enjoy her wisdom and check out her wonderful work over at WeirTX.com

The floor is yours, Jen:

Fairy tales are timeless. As a little girl, I loved listening to the Cinderella movie record, (yes, the record), twirling and dancing throughout the house wishing my fairy godmother would whisk me away from the abuse and hardship I lived in. To this day if I hear “Bibbidi Bobbidi Boo” I am transported back to that apartment in Germany, dancing around and around.

As I grew up, I still loved fairy tales, yet I resolutely decided those were not for someone like me. Fairy tale stories and movies are, well, fairy tales. Fictional. Silly illusions and pipe dreams, created to draw little ones into a false sense of reality.

Who knew, telling myself a story of “that can’t happen to me” would seal the deal on never achieving what it was my heart truly desired? Never would I have imagined that because of the story I kept telling myself, finance and business goals would become difficult to realize.

As an adult in a career I was quite successful. On the outside, success looked like it was mine. But when self-reflection was in play, there was a sense of “not quite”.

It wasn’t a manner of discontent, it was more of, I had set a goal and yet fell just short each time. In one place of work I was successful, but not at the top of my field. In another, I was a sought-after educator, but not the best of the best. “No one can be the best in their field, can they?” I reasoned. After all, biblically speaking, aren’t we to be content in all things, satisfied with less in life? I mean, really, who did I think I was anyway, wanting to achieve outstanding success.

 

Mediocrity started to find its roots in my soul.

That is, until I set foot on my most recent path.

 

The business I found myself in, quite literally stumbling into it, there was no ceiling. There was room for anyone who wanted that kind of success. It was completely and totally up to me, my efforts and my choice. Period. No one else called the shots. I set my sights on the top! I went after it, hard, only to met with mediocre results. Once again I found middle of the road success. “Most people in this company would give anything to be where you are,” said a well-meaning friend. But, I’m not most people…

 

Why couldn’t I grab hold of this elusive dream?

 

The story I had told myself all my life… greatness and success don’t happen to people like me. Desperately asking my mind the question, why am I falling short month after month, the answer came. You see, when you ask yourself a question, your mind searches for the answer. My mind spoke back to me saying, “sweet girl, this is the story we have told since we were that little girl”. Growing up in abuse, poverty and separation from parents created a story of unworthiness. It’s not a good story, but it is a powerful one. Also, its one that is simply not true. It is built on lies and false perspectives.

It’s one thing to recognize the false story; it’s another to be able to break free from it. In order to grab what is rightfully yours, you must tell a different story and in order to do that, you must heal from emotional wounds that are creating the lie.

If you realize your life is not what you would have ordered, may I gently suggest, you deserve better? You deserve the life you have always dreamed of, that one from when you were twirling as a young child.

Ask yourself some questions;

  1. How do you talk to yourself each day? Meaning, that mind chatter, what is it like? What does it say, and what feeling does it create within you? When you self-talk, do you feel uplifted?
  2. Why are you talking that way to yourself?
  3. If a miracle occurred tomorrow, that would start a path for you toward the life you desire, what would it be?

 

Once you write these out, sit with the third answer. Look at it, why is this the miracle? Write out an affirmation statement of actually having this thing, such as “I am ______, or I have ______, or I create____.” You see, affirmations are a form of strengthening the brain. Affirmations come from the Latin root word ‘affirmare,’ meaning to make steady or strengthen. When we speak out affirming words to ourselves or others, we are creating a steadiness in others and strengthening our minds in order to believe and accomplish that which we are seeking.

As you speak out affirmations, use your mind to imagine, what it would look like in your life, if what you’re creating those desires. Imagine the feeling that comes with it. Perhaps even the sound. If your accomplishment ends in fanfare like walking across a stage, perhaps you can pair your dream with a walk up song.

Rewriting your story takes some careful thought and time to put it into practice. Be patient with yourself. Sometimes a memory will come up that you connect that is the reason you have this belief. That’s the sweet spot my friend. That’s the point you must push past and break through to the other side.

*** if you just started signing The Doors tune, you are my people***

It’s true though, breaking through that barrier that has held you back al these years takes a bit of pushing and effort on your part. But i can assure you, when you do, oh that victory is so sweet.

For those who just read this and thought, yea, lovely, but you have no idea my life. There’s no way I could possibly do … Can I tell you, I hear you, and not only do I hear, I see you my friend. After investing three years into the study of why dreams aren’t achieved and what is holding people back from breaking free from the past, I wrote a course in order to help those folks do just that. It would be an honor and a joy to walk with you in that journey back to your fairy tale life. Some stories take a little more than simply running through a few journal prompts. Some require digging, uprooting and replanting. If that is you, this course was written for you. Apply here~ https://www.weirtx.com/essentially-free

 

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Believe Coaching Energy Purpose

Unbridled

Unbridled. Unchecked. Unrestrained. Uncontrolled.

That’s accurately describes oh so many of the relationships in our lives. Every time you’ve said yes to plans when you wanted to stay home, every time you’ve wanted to pick the restaurant but acquiesced, every time you’ve kept your lips closed when you truly had something to say, you lacked a faithful boundary… to yourself.

I’m good at saying no. I’m decisive. I’m clear on my standards. But, like with most things we discuss, it’s a practice and not a perfect. There are areas, relationships, and situations where I have unchecked boundaries for sure. And thus the Universe presented to me an advertisement on Facebook for a book launch. The book is written by a woman I’ve heard speak before. Her name is Nancy Levin. She worked in events at Hay House for years. She’s written several other books (which I’ve downloaded but haven’t read yet… at least when we hoard digital books, they don’t accumulate dust on a shelf!). I have to admit, I almost scrolled past the ad, as is the common practice, until I saw the co-host of Ms. Levin’s book launch: Gabby Bernstein. My teacher. My mentor. I’m in. One click… ticket purchased.

A book club friend and I went to the launch this past Thursday evening and it did not disappoint. In fact, before I’ve even cracked the spine of Setting Boundaries Will Set You Free, I’ve come to realize that I have more work to do in this area than my ego would have me believe. How perfect to experience this talk and now own this book on the precipice of a new decade.

Levin book.jpg

Here are some highlights from my notes from Nancy and Gabby’s talk:

  • Nancy said, “Everything that we are seeking externally needs to be resolved internally first.”
  • We have to clean up what made us boundary-less. Set yourself a place at the table.
  • Some of us are “living an other-referenced life,” as we function the way everyone else wants us to.
  • Your boundaries are between you and you.
  • Gabby shared a powerful mantra for setting and affirming boundaries: “There is no world where this exists for me anymore.”
  • And here’s the mic drop moment from Nancy: “The biggest myth about boundaries is that other people are crossing them.”

I look over at the yellow and blue cover of this book with anticipation—another tool to level up and live this life my way, in the way that fits my desires, my purpose, my heart. This is a book that will not collect dust on my bookshelf.

Much love to my #boundarybadass2020 fam!

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Believe Coaching Energy

A Blast of Inspiration

The ideas rarely come when you’re sitting, or pacing, and mentally screaming at them to show up. We “hear” when we get quiet, when we loosen the grip…

 

That’s why you’ll have that epic idea while shampooing your hair or why you can play out the best version of a difficult conversation when you’re alone in the car.

I think it was my Reiki healer Lisa who shared this metaphor with me. Allow me to paraphrase. If you catch a beautiful butterfly in your hand and you squeeze your hand tightly in effort to hold onto her, you crush her wings and probably kill her. If you wrap your fingers gently, you can cradle her safely, just long enough to commit her beauty to memory.

It’s touching lightly.

Now I know we aren’t often catching butterflies… but you can catch my drift.

So, I won’t keep you long today, dear readers. Power off the screens. Take off the smart watch, unless you’re tracking your steps with it. Find a few minutes of peace… get quiet and “listen.”

That first thought, that’s intuition. The follow-up ones, the ones that tell you no and why not, that’s ego.

Go with the intuition. I can’t wait to hear about what your next move is.

Much love.

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Believe Coaching Purpose

Cheers.

I don’t journal daily. I vision cast and write about my goals and the movement I’m forging alongside you beauties but I don’t write about my day or my feelings with consistency… except here.

I do keep a precise calendar. You can’t manage time but you can manage activity. You’ve heard me say before that I would make a great personal assistant… and I am a great one, to myself.

As I sat down to write to you today, I flipped through the 52 weeks of 2019 in my calendar. I looked over everything I did and everything we did together, dentist appointments to yoga classes, coffee dates to Iconic and Young Living Convention. The year whipped by and, boy did we get a lot done!

My vision, what I’m working towards, what I’m “getting done” but will never actually be done, is to help people work through the pressure and develop themselves fully to in turn better serve themselves, their families and their communities. I work to reaffirm to you that you matter, that you spend so much time and energy supporting everyone around you– it’s time to support yourself! I work to slow down and surrender on my own journey, to “do” less and go deeper… for me, with you, for every being.

You can set a resolution. You can write down a goal. You can put down those practices as trivial and useless.

Or you can join me in the movement.

As I crack the spine on my 2020 calendar, I’m inspired… inspired to see and to hear about the peace you are bringing into your daily routines. I am eager to hear about the milestones you reach and the new goals you set for yourself as you find and use those beautiful metaphorical wings that have been poised to open up for so long now. I sit here motivated to serve, to support, to light the way for you, especially in those moments where the darkness creeps in.

And mostly I sit in gratitude, as many of you reading this light the way for me so very often.

I’ll grab a pencil when I’m done here today and start to fill in some magic for 2020 on the calendar. I’ll also grab my treasured teal marker and circle July 18, 2020… you can do the same and then smile with anticipation to find out why… I love a teaser!

In the meantime, take this as full permission to take care of yourself. You don’t have to wait until the clock strikes midnight on Tuesday into Wednesday. You can start this very moment. Chances are you’ve already started, so take this as a moment to re-up, step up and shine. Dream big and know I am here to walk the path with you. Let’s shine together.

Cheers to another magical year. Much love!

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Believe Purpose

Throwback: Gifts

As we roll rapidly into the gift-giving season, allow me to share with you a vintage story from December 2016 titled “Gifts.”

I love giving gifts.  I guess that’s my “love language,” if you subscribe to that philosophy (remember, vintage “RHOC” with Vicki talking love languages…).  It’s not a materialistic thing; it’s a symbolic gesture.  I love giving gifts for no particular occasion, other than “I saw this and it made me think of you.”  That said, my gift giving nature was tested this holiday season.  I blame the combination of the upside-down surreal 2016 and the fact that we recently moved (as I write this, there are boxes and piles of I don’t know what to my right).  I couldn’t get a handle on time and getting the mountain of tasks done these past few weeks.  I always take on a lot, so that’s not the problem.  But I think I undervalued the magnitude of moving and just how much mental effort and physical time it would take.  Again, the curse of the achiever kicked it.

I got a handle on the gifts this year in three parts: one part obsessive organization, one part miracle, and one part best friend came down from Albany and finished all that was left undone.  Far more quickly than they were selected, purchased, wrapped and arranged, the gifts were given and floated out of my existence (except for those given to the Bunny-daddy, of course).  For those of us who take a certain kind of value in gift-giving, the exchange is the true gift.  It’s the gesture of it all.  It’s not the monetary value.  It’s not given for a subsequent lauding.  It’s the moment.  It’s the look on the receiver’s face, often times a laugh, maybe even a happy tear or two.  It’s the hug and/or the thank you card.

I love to give gifts because of the feeling in the moment.  And I love to receive them for much the same reason.  I don’t like clutter (again, it’s fairy difficult to stay focused writing this because there’s an utter mess to my right!) and sometimes gifts of a particular nature become clutter in my rigid world.  But I will always love the gesture and the symbolism of gifting and that supersedes the clutter.

I have a lot of gifts, as in abilities.  I use them, I share them and I proudly kick ass with them.  I gave a lot of gifts over the past few days, although with the typical holiday whirlwind combined with 2016’s wrath, I don’t know if I let myself feel the moment enough!  Again, putting pressure on myself… that’s a trait that I need to hone into a gift.  And if history’s any teacher, I can make that happen.

Fans, friends, loves… I must go tackle the piles of stuff, some gifts and some not.  Enjoy the magic of giving.  Much love.

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Believe Coaching Energy Purpose

Envision

“I bet you’ve got an idea-to-reality story, too. A time where you had a mere thought about something you wanted to see, do, create, experience or become—and you eventually did it.” -Marie Forleo

The universe leaves clues. These clues show us the potential power we have.

No clue what year it was… I guess I could try to figure it out but it really doesn’t matter. Just know that it was sometime between 2002 and 2010. I was walking up to a pizza place in the town where I grew up. Parked out front was a silver Mercedes-Benz E55 AMG. 55 has been my favorite number since childhood so I chalked up the attention to that. As I walked past the car, a thought popped into my head: I will have an E55 AMG one day.

I scoffed at that thought. I never wanted a Mercedes (don’t get me wrong, I love cars… but that just wasn’t a make on my wish list) and an AMG… that’s some sort of upgrade that I don’t need driving to and from work. But the thought popping into my head like a fact, not a latent wish or desire but a fact, that I would have this car one day was undeniable.

July 2010, I connect with the Bunny-Daddy. We start to hang out, eventually start to date. The car in his driveway: a silver E55 AMG.

Now, the one I saw in the pizza place parking lot years prior was not driven by him—different body style and he was driving a Mini back then. But there it was in his driveway and a year later in our driveway, the E55.

The universe leaves clues.

It’s a knowing. Just like the feeling I got as my mother made a right turn onto the campus of Sacred Heart University for a visit and tour in 1999. Sitting in the passenger seat, I just felt it, knew it—I was going to school here.

I only applied to that one college. I wasn’t wasting my time on other applications and essays. SHU was my school. This was a non-negotiable. I could have questioned, doubted, allowed circumstances to derail me. I could have worried about admissions, about not challenging myself enough, about tuition and housing costs, about not giving myself options… but I didn’t let that what-if worry way of thinking interfere with my mission. With that commitment to myself and my goal, everything worked itself out beautifully, including scholarship and work opportunities that supplemented a portion of tuition and housing. And thank goodness I didn’t back off of my dream—I met my best friend at SHU, my sister.

The universe works fast when we are faithful to our dreams.

I went to bed one night last spring, asking the universe for a way to make the one-on-one coaching program my incredible business coach offers work into my budget. The very next day, my coach announced a small group program that fit perfectly into my budget and gives me not only great access to her wisdom but a group of like-minded leaders to soar with.

I asked and I received.

I share these stories to remind you that you have this power. The universe, God, spirit, whatever aligns with you, wants every single one of us to have the best possible experience here on this mortal coil. But you have to do your part.

Sure, the Mercedes story is just a cute one, just a sign from universe that if that thought can come true, the possibilities abound. (And in case you are wondering, no I did not date the Bunny-Daddy for the car. A used Mercedes does not a relationship make!)

I’m reading Everything is Figureoutable with my spiritual and personal development book club. That’s where I came across the quote that starts this story. If these touchstone moments, a mode of transportation, a college experience, a life-and-business enhancing coaching program, can manifest their way to me… my friends, the possibilities are endless. But you end them before they begin if you limit your thoughts, if you halt your efforts, if you fall victim to distraction, if you don’t believe just how magically powerful you are.

I believe in you… and I do believe that 7-year-old me who just knew she would own a Guns N’ Roses Appetite for Destruction pinball machine one day will be jumping for joy in the next few years… I’m making it happen.

 

Ready to start manifesting magic in your life? It’s time for a call, my friend.

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Believe Bunnies Purpose Rescue

A Problem & A Fix

Loyal readers know by now that I’m the main point of contact for a volunteer animal rescue organization called the Long Island Rabbit Rescue Group.  Earlier this week, we received a remarkable number of emails from people who are looking to get rid of their rabbits. We call this rehoming, but that’s often a soft euphemism. I wrote a post in our volunteer group that day that went deeper than our usual posts there. I decided to save it and share it with you today, a look into that side of my Rescue world.

Here’s what I had to say to our team:

 

Education. That’s how we “fix” this problem.

I don’t tell you any of this to upset you or to anger you. I share with you so we can support each other in our shared mission of ensuring the safety and protection of domestic rabbits.

Today alone LIRRG received emails about 28 unwanted rabbits. 28. Today. On Long Island. Some from “accidental litters” that could have been prevented with education.

These people reach out to us, trying to do the “right thing” by an animal either they no longer want, no longer can care for or were just plain not expecting… but we have no recourse for them. Even if we had a shelter facility, it would be filled by the end of the week. And no, the Town shelters typically do not accept rabbits, as they are not equipped to care for them. Yet the towns and counties still allow the sale. I wonder if our representatives know there is even an issue…

I know where these rabbits are coming from. We ask those who email us and they tell us. None of these people welcomed rabbit(s) into their lives planning on getting rid of him/her/them. But, with few exceptions, they were not given accurate or any information upon purchase. They also chose not to do any research before purchase… but if there was a chance that the shirt I bring up to the register at Macy’s was going to chew my couch and potentially multiply into 15 shirts, I think it would be the staff or management’s job to let me know that.

We need to get out in FULL FORCE to educate, to teach about proper care, spay/neuter and the benefits of adoption over shopping. Although we are making a difference, the problem is multiplying like… well, like rabbits.

Sure, you rather stay home on a Saturday than staff a table at an education. Sure, you rather text your bestie than email your legislatures. But, I am also sure that you look over at the exercise pen in your family room and know that your rabbit would want you to get involved on behalf of his/her/their furry friends.

 

So, dear readers, maybe you’re not a rabbit owner or lover… but there are some beings in your life that you love, including yourself! In honor of that love and care, do something today to make the world safer and brighter… send a “thinking of you” text, donate $10 to your local animal rescue, treat yourself to a 10 minute massage. Spread love.

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Believe Coaching Purpose Teacher Life

Organized.

Nature’s first law is order. Without order, you are cruising toward chaos. In chaos, you stifle or completely crush the amazing experience you are on this earth to have.

I’m not self or professionally diagnosed OCD… far from it. Trust, there are disorganized piles and areas in our home. Also trust that I know those areas are not performing at their best, but I give myself some grace and know that I can do it all… just not all at once. Work in progress.

Speaking of work, I work my teaching job, my businesses and coordinate Rabbit Rescue with epic organization. It might look messy in the middle at some points—long-time readers may recall the struggle of the messy desk. I have it under control now. It took working with a coach to get that in order, WELL WORTH IT!

People often marvel at how I organize and how I manage, produce and batch activities. We all have our strengths and we contribute best to the world when we refine and use those strengths! Today, I’m sharing with you some of the tools that I use to stay in order. Please know that grabbing these things does not translate to change in your personal or professional world. You have to find what works for you… and I’d love to help you figure that out!

But in the meantime, here are four things I use every day:

  1. Lined Post-its

As much as I’m cool with mess, I like lines to write on. I often write across several lines or hold the sticky note on an angle but I like that the lines are there. Top tip: when making lists, keep them to 3-5 tasks. Lists of 75 things to do are just overwhelming. Do it. Ditch it. Delegate it.

  1. Pencils

Basic, I know, but I like being able to erase and I like that pencil comes from the earth… gets me rooted. When I’m firing off something quick, I gravitate toward a mechanical pencil. When I’m journaling or outlining a talk, I like a good old-fashioned wood pencil, Ticonderoga brand whenever possible. An ample eraser is a must.

  1. Markers

A fine point Bic Marking or Intensity gets me going. I set my calendar for the week on Sundays, usually right after I’m done writing to you and I use this collection of markers. I’m not a strict color-coder but I like having the variety to make even the mundane pop.

  1. Timer

Time management is a misleading term. We can’t manage time; it flows on its own! But we can manage activity. Without the timer, I’ll scroll and waste time! While it’s good to wander sometimes, we have some epic work to do, saving bunny lives and upgrading human lives. I use the timer to keep me focused when answering emails or scheduling social media posts. I let creative time flow without a cap but I always set the timer when I’m getting stuff done!

 

I’d love to know what you use to keep it all together and organized! Comment or send me an email: believeinbunnies@gmail.com

If you’re ready to find what works for you, I’m poised to help you. Schedule a call today!

Much love!

Click here

 

 

 

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Believe Coaching Energy Healing Purpose Teacher Life Young Living

The Essence

In the gaps of time this weekend, I’m watching season three of Netflix’s Atypical, a show that has given me more perspective about teaching individuals with Autism than any graduate or professional development course ever did. In the episode I finished this morning, protagonist Sam is tasked with an assignment about essence. Specifically, he has to depict the essence of a chosen animal, not just draw what the animal looks like. This throws his logical mind into chaos. Just what is the essence of a penguin?

As the episode spun on, I got to thinking about the little amber glass bottles that sit atop by bathroom counter, aside my kitchen sink, inside of a pouch in my purse and upon my desk and my bedside table. Essential oils. The essence of plants, some singular, some blended, all simply the best. I wasn’t surprised when Sam’s art teacher rolled on some lavender essential oil, saying it calms him. Girl… if you only knew what these essences have done for me.

Don’t get it twisted—the contents of these bottles cannot treat, diagnose, cure a darn thing. What they have done for me… how do I put this? The essence of these plants help me to slow down, look around and see this life for what it really is… and just how sweet it can be, if we chose to participate from that perspective. These aromatic liquids have been a tool for me to ground into my body and to use my senses and my higher faculties with clarity. They’ve reminded me that I don’t have to sprint through life complaining from Sunday through Thursday like so many choose to do. They’ve allowed me to find a way through the mind mess and into a place of peace… and they help bring me back into alignment when I fall away from that peace.

As Sam searched for the essence of his chosen penguin using his thoughts, his notebook and the support of his teacher, family and best friend as tools along the way, I couldn’t help but think of my journey, searching for the essence of me, of how I want to show up and serve in this world. I use my thoughts, I have many notebooks and I am surrounded by incredibly supportive people, many of whom I met through the essential oil community. I look up from my laptop and see these little bottles, donning labels like Humility, Acceptance and Hope, like Light the Fire, Sacred Frankincense and Harmony, like Lemon, Geranium and Peppermint… the essence of these plants helping me get to the essence of who I am, what I want and how I want to be in this world.

Take a moment today. Breathe deeply. Close those beautiful eyes. Listen to you. What is at your core? Drop the “stuff” and get down to the essence. Give yourself permission to shine in that truth.

And, if you need help getting down to it… I sure have a way to help you. Much love.

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Believe Coaching Energy Purpose

Want & Feel

I’m going to push you today.

I was on a call with my coach on Friday and she presented us with an idea that has been swirling around my head ever since:

Are you doing what you want or are you doing what you feel like?

Follow me here… because those two things often aren’t the same, particularly if you’re not getting the results you want in your personal or professional life.

You want toned abs. You feel like lying on the couch and watching season 5 of Schitt’s Creek again. So you lie on the couch. You tear up when David and Patrick get engaged. You look down at your belly and the thoughts flood in: I’ll never have the body I want. I can’t. I won’t. I don’t. I’m so lazy. I’m so this, that, whatever. Maybe the thoughts go into outside blame: this diet/exercise program doesn’t work. I don’t have time. I don’t have help.

And so it goes.

But in reality, dear ones, the external factors are controlled by you. You chose to do what you felt like rather than take a step toward what you say you want. No judgment. Nothing “wrong” with that… just getting aware.

I’ll run another scenario for you: You want more organization in your home. You feel like you have to go to your friend’s whatever party. And you don’t feel like paying someone to help you get organized.

So you chose to spend your time at and your money on what you think you should (or shouldn’t) and, again, you don’t get what you want.

One more scenario. I’m trying to connect with all of you here.

You want a romantic relationship. You don’t feel like meeting new people. You don’t feel like “putting yourself out there.”

Another week/month/year goes by. You don’t get what you think you want because you’re choosing to do what you feel like rather than go toward what you want.

 

And I get it. A lot of the things that we want are big, scary, out of our comfort zones, require us to stretch and change… so we sit in the pocket of what we feel like rather than aligning what we feel and what we want to achieve.

A lot of these things that we want require or simply come to us with more ease if we ask for or pay for help, but we feel like we shouldn’t be vulnerable or shouldn’t spend our money this way.

I said I was going to push you today, so here it goes. Today, just get aware of what you want, what you feel and what you’re doing. You don’t have to make a change, unless you’re called to do so. Just examine it today.

I suspect there are some really bright light bulbs going off for you.

If you’ve gained any awareness today, email me: believeinbunnies@gmail.com

I’d love to hear your stories!

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