Believe In Bunnies

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birthday

Believe Bunnies Energy Healing Purpose Reiki Rescue Uncategorized

Friends? Friends.

It wasn’t that long ago when I had no friends. I can remember the first time I said it out loud. It felt… shameful. It felt embarrassing, even though I was saying it to the Bunny Daddy, a man I can say anything to, without judgment.

Yeah, there were people around… but I felt alone. That theme wove itself through my story over the years. I would do anything to pull in anyone, nice and close, trying to fight the feeling of loneliness… desperately trying to find acceptance.

I can look back and realize that there was no way I was going to find authentic friendships when I wasn’t being authentic with myself.

The turning point came right around the time when I said it out loud: I have no friends. That also came in a tornado of being miserable at work and having no hobbies, pastimes or things to do that brought me joy. At all. I was a literal ball of tears on our living room floor.

I cracked open and let the light flood in. I took steps, small at first, to find a sense of peace in my head. I started volunteering, not to fill the time, not even for a second considering that I would make friends that way—just volunteering to help a little rescue group with a big mission. I found that my weekly volunteer hours were times where my anxious feelings were non-existent. I found a place to let my gifts (organization being one) shine.

I started listening to myself more, giving myself that permission and honing that skill through holistic and “alternative” routes like Reiki, yoga, therapy… getting down to it. Facing and embracing what made me feel good, great and beyond. Dropping the need to fit in, to live someone else’s dream, to fit an image that felt suffocating.

As I listened to and “found” me, some darn wonderful people started to show up. I often say to them, when they compliment my growth and my courage, that I am merely a reflection of them. And I mean that they can only see and love this light in me because it is a light that shines in them too.

Last night, I celebrated by 37th birthday. The girl who had no friends is now the woman who was surrounded by 16 women, each blazing their own gorgeous, inspiring trail. I know they love me. Despite the size of the group surrounding me over the years or the length of time we were “friends,” I never knew that for sure before. But these women… they love me. And I love me.

A big cheers to the rest of the crew who couldn’t join us last night… I am utterly amazed by the quantity and the quality of friends that are in my life—all because I took (and still take) the time to find my joy and purpose. Much love.

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Believe Bunnies Healing Rescue Uncategorized

Feeling Poorly…

Last Sunday, literally minutes after I posted my blog, I began to peel a banana.  Bunny families know the mayhem that ensues at first snap of the peel (does the long part have a name? Is it a stem?).  Well, Tater Tot didn’t come running– Usually he zooms in when I so much as glance in the direction of a banana.  I held my breath and prayed he was just in such a deep sleep in his Sunday afternoon spot that he didn’t smell the nanner.  I approached.  I wafted the fruit.  I broke off a little piece, while Peanut was bopping up and down in his crate, anxiously awaiting his sweet treat.  I stuck the piece under Tater’s nose.  No go.  Uh oh.

I dropped everything that my typical “lockdown but rarely sit down Sunday” entails.  If he’s not taking a treat, something is definitely and seriously wrong, or about to be.  Our emergency kit is at the ready (and thankfully not used often).  I began to lay out the supplies, sent a text to M., my rescue director and mentor, and contacted Dr. M., our beautiful and beautifully dedicated veterinarian.  I cannot stress enough the value of having a truly rabbit-savvy vet, especially one open 7 days/week and who takes emergencies 24 hours/day.  I snapped into Nurse Mommy mode the best I could.  Tater’s temperature was 100.7—not horrible but low enough to be a sign of something wrong.  He was refusing every treat or green we tried to tempt him with.  I gave him a dose of gas drops and a dose of pain reliever, as directed by M. and Dr. M.

Bunny daddy and I brought the Tot into our room, a room he never goes in, to tempt his bunny instincts to explore.  As we suspected some GI issues brewing, we wanted to keep him moving as much as possible.  He wanted none of that!  He just wanted to lie down.  We alternated between poking him to move and giving him tummy rubs.  Our darling little boy.  45 minutes later, his temperature was 101.2 but still no desire for food, treats or activity.  There was one medicine that we didn’t have in our emergency kit (but we do now!) so our options were to drive the 40ish minutes to the vets’ office to pick up the meds, then 40ish minutes back home and hope that they were the right ones for whatever was brewing… or just pop the little one into his travel carrier and take him to see Dr. M.  We went with option two… car rides can often help loosen up anything in the little tummy that could be causing issues.

As suspected, Dr. M. felt a tummy full of gas!  She gave Tater Tot two more meds and sent us home with a supply of meds and instructions.  After a few days of meds 3 times/day and thankfully only one day of force feeding, the little potato is all better.  And he’s still with us today, bunstructing everything in sight because:

-we are attentive rabbit owners.  We know his habits and knew quickly that something wasn’t right.

-we took immediate action.

-we have an emergency kit on hand at all times.

-we know how to use the items in our emergency kit. If you own a rabbit and don’t know how to take temperature, get lessons!

-we contacted our support team (experienced rescue director and rabbit-savvy vet) right away.

tater-5

Tater Tot, from his 5th birthday photo shoot.

And yes, sometimes, even these measures are not enough and our little beloveds have to cross the Rainbow Bridge.  It’s all a part of our experience in this dimension.  But being as prepared, in both knowledge and execution, as possible helped keep our Tater Tot with us.  My darling boy.  And all this on the eve of his 5th birthday.  I’d write more now, but he’s surely destroying something in the living room and I must attend to that! Much love.

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angels Uncategorized

It’s a Celebration…

I love my birthday.  As cheesy as that may sound, I just love celebrating me.  And I always have.  I am proud of myself for embracing my gifts (meaning my abilities… not the adorable bracelets I got last night!).  I embrace getting older, too.  I never feel anything but great about the advancing numbers.  I have my mother to thank for that.  She turns 60 this year.  Her unpretentious confidence is an inspiration to women of all ages!

When I celebrate me, it just comes naturally that I celebrate those who are hopping this path with me.  I was born on March 30, 1982, my uncle’s 16th birthday.  I consider him my best friend, my guide, my brother.  Besides my parents, he and his other half spent more time with me than any other person growing up, so I credit them with raising me just as much as I do my parents.  We always celebrate our birthdays together.  Even this year, as Stephen turned 50, we shared a cake with both names on it.  In some ways, we feel like twins, 16 years removed.

cake

Happy 50th Stephen… Happy 34th me.

Every year, I coordinate some sort of celebration for my day with my friends– some years with more classic revelry than others but always uplifting.  Last night, I was blessed to sit at the head of a table, flanked by the most beautiful souls.  Thank you ladies, and the Chris’s who love them, for being there with me.  When I sat in meditative reflection this morning, I saw our table from last night.  My mind’s journey took me around the table where I handed each of my friends in attendance a yellow rose, that classic symbol of friendship.  I treasure you ladies, boundlessly.

I carry my Kindle with me almost everywhere and I often glide through the electronic pages of Doreen Virtue’s Angel Numbers 101, the reference book for numbers we see and numbers that resonate with us.  So before I sat to write this morning, I looked up Virtue’s “translation” of the number 34, the age number that I earned last Wednesday and celebrated thoroughly for the last 8 days:  “34 Your prayers are heard and answered by the angels and ascended masters, who are with you right now.”

Damn right.  Cheers to my 34th and to my earth angels, those with furry tails and those without!

34

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