I Don’t Know What to Say
I write these stories to you best when I don’t think about you. When I think about you, I think about what you want to read about. Then, I get all judgy with myself that you won’t want to read about the things I’m inclined to write about. Are you here for the Reiki and spiritual tales, so you click away from the Rescue stories? Are you a bunny person, but the spiritual stuff turns you off? It’s a quick mind-spin and I almost don’t get my fingers on the keys when that “stuff” is the stuff swirling through my brain.
That’s judgment. And projection. That’s self-sabotage. Consciously, those aren’t choices I would make. When I stop, breathe and think, I want to write what I’m thinking or feeling in the moment. Maybe if it’s not for you, it could be for you or you or even you. But it’s always for me. Writing this is part of my personal development, walking the walk of what I teach, putting in the work on me.
Our brains click into this judgment mode as a form of protection. If you believe in science, our brains have evolved to keep us safe. We judge the stimulus around us based on past experiences, past hurts. Go to the old “hand on the hot stove” adage—we learn not to touch it again because we remember getting burned. Some of us love to keep our hands pressed firmly on the hot stove, even after multiple burns… but that’s a topic for another day.
I sat down today and I didn’t know what to say to you. What if you don’t like it? I have to figure out where that all comes from… and I have just the tool to help me get started… Much Love.